City of Architects

This picture shows a good old-fashioned cross-burning with some good ol’ KKK boys, followed by the official flag of the United Methodist Church, and finally the top of Tartu’s new penis pillar, called the Snail Tower, in English. Maybe it’s just me, but they do seem to have something in common, at least in terms of looks. I’m not saying anything, just pointing out a coincidence.

I would, however, like to join the chorus in saying that much of the modern architecture in Tartu is horrid. In every way. Beautiful streets boasting classical Estonian architecture, while strongly influenced by German and Russian styles, being immaculately restored to their original splendor, interrupted by bland, sterile cubes (or spirals) of concrete with ocean-liner portholes for windows.

There are several things we could do about this. One: continue on this path, staining the city’s “milieu” with tasteless, poor quality architecture. But then people should cease their complaints about how during the Soviet period all the bomb-damaged plots of the city were filled with tasteless, poor quality architecture. I love how people are now free to build whatever they want, yet build the same crap they say they always hated.

Two: our architects could just as easily design just as bad buildings with façades that actually blend in with the surroundings. Surely you could build a replica of Town Hall out of panels and cinder blocks. But then who will teach these architects taste and class? More importantly, the owners who ultimately decide upon the building’s design have even less taste than the architects themselves. Oddly enough, they defend their choices and designs by saying, “It has never been done before.” Well then we might as well build a fifty-floor Pac Man downtown. That would be new and fresh, too!

Three: the city government could exercise a little authority over what is allowed to be built where. But then who will teach them taste and class? They often are the same people who smack together these Borg cubes.

Modern architecture is a great thing in many cases. Generally, if it’s covered in glass, it can’t look too bad. Take the new Kaubamaja Department Store right in the middle of downtown. As it is, it’s a pale reflection of the old market, complete with columns, that was destroyed in World War Two. It looks like a public toilet, covered in grayish bathroom tiles. Yet even this box could be drastically improved by chipping off the tiles and replacing them with something glassy and classy.

The new mall across the street has no discernable shape whatsoever, but as it’s covered in shiny material, I like it. At least, it’s not offensive and embarrassing like the Snail Tower. But have you ever seen a twenty-story plus skyscraper covered in plaster? It must have been the cheapest stuff on sale.